hello, living in tucson now with a wonderful woman and her daughter. thinking of you.

I imagine a lot of people have seen this before.

Enjoy,

Linda Roth (aka, grannyroth)

You know you live in PHOENIX when:

You buy salsa by the quart.

Your Christmas decorations includes a half a yard of sand and 100 paper bags.

You think that a red light is merely a suggestion.

All of your out-of-state friends start to visit after October but clear out come the end of April.

You think someone driving and wearing oven mitts is clever.

Most of the restaurants in your town have the first name "El" or "Los".

You think six tons of crushed rock makes a beautiful yard.

You've signed so many petitions to recall governors that you can't remember the name of the incumbent.

You notice your car overheating before you drive it.

Your house is made of stucco and Styrofoam, and has a red clay tile roof.

You can say Hohokam and people don't think you're laughing funny.

You no longer associate bridges (or rivers) with water.

You see more irrigation water on the street than there is in the Salt River.

You know a swamp cooler is not a happy hour drink.

You can say 115 degrees without fainting.

Every other vehicle is a 4X4.

You can be in the snow, then drive for an hour and it will be over 100 degrees.

Vehicles with open windows have the right-of-way in the summer.

You have to go to a fake beach for some fake waves.

People break out coats when the temperature drops below 70.

You discover, in July, that it only takes two fingers to drive your car.

The pool water is warmer than you are.

You can make sun tea instantly.

People will drive over a hundred miles just to see snow.

You run your air conditioner in the middle of winter so you can use your fireplace.

Most people will not drink tap water unless they are under dire conditions.

Most homes have more firearms then people.

Kids will ask "What's a mosquito?".

People with black cars or have black upholstery in their car are automatically assumed to be from out-of-state or nuts.

You notice the best parking place is determined by shade instead of distance.

The AC is on your list of best friends.

Monday Night Football starts at 7:00 instead of 9:00.

You realize that Valley Fever isn't a disco dance.

You can finish a Big Gulp in 10 minutes and go back for seconds.

The water from the cold water tap is the same temperature as the hot one.

You can (correctly) pronounce the words: Saguaro, Tempe, Gila Bend, San Xavier, Canyon de Chelly, Mogollon Rim, Cholla, and Ajo.

It's noon in July, kids are on summer vacation, and not one person is moving on the streets.

You actually burn your hand opening the car door.

Sun screen is sold year round, kept at the front of the checkout counter, a formula less than 30 spf is a joke, and you wear it just to go to Circle K.

Some fool can market mini-misters for joggers and other fools will actually buy them.

Hot air balloons can't go up, because the air outside is hotter than the air inside.

No one would dream of putting vinyl upholstery in a car.

Many of these brought smiles to my face, so I wanted to share them with y'all. Just about the only thing missing is Wallace & Ladmo!

Close your eyes... And go back in time...

Before the Internet or the MAC,

Before semi automatics and crack.

Before SEGA or Super Nintendo... Way Back...

I'm talking about hide and seek at dusk.

The Good Humor man

Red light, Green light. The Corner Store.

Hopscotch, butterscotch, doubledutch, jacks, kickball, dodgeball.

Mother-may-I? Red Rover and Roly Poly Hula Hoops.

Running through the sprinkler. The smell of the sun and licking salty lips.

Wax lips and mustaches, An ice cream cone on a warm summer night. Chocolate or vanilla or strawberry or maybe butter pecan.

A cherry coke from the fountain at the corner drug store.

But wait...

Watching Saturday Morning cartoons...short commercials.

Fat Albert, Road Runner, He-man. The Three stooges, and Bugs, or staying up for Gunsmoke.

Or back further, listening to Superman on the radio,

When around the corner seemed far away, and going downtown seemed like going somewhere!!!

A million mosquito bites, Sticky fingers...Cops and Robbers, Cowboys and Indians, Zorro. Climbing trees,

Building igloos out of snow banks.

Walking to school no matter what the weather.

Running till you were out of breath,

Laughing so hard that your stomach hurt.

Jumping on the bed. Pillow fights...Spinning around, getting dizzy and falling down was cause for giggles.

Being tired from playing. (Remember that??))

The worst embarrassment was being picked last for a team.

War was a card game. Water balloons were the ultimate weapon.

Baseball cards in the spokes transformed any bike into a motorcycle.

I'm not finished yet...

Eating Kool-aid powder. Remember when there were two types of sneakers for girls and boys??? (Keds and PF Flyers)and the only time you wore them was at school for gym.

It wasn't odd to have two or three "best" friends.

When nobody owned a purebred dog.

When a quarter was a decent allowance, and another quarter a "miracle".

When milk went up one cent and everyone talked about it for weeks?

When you'd reach into a muddy gutter for a penny???

When you got your windshield cleaned, oil checked and gas pumped without asking, for FREE and you even got trading stamps to boot!!! You didn't have to pay for air.

When laundry detergent had free glasses, dishes or towels hidden inside the box.

When nearly everyone's mom was at home when the kids got there.

When it took five minutes for the TV to warm up, if you even had one.

When your Mom wore nylons that came in two pieces.

It was magic when dad would "remove" his thumb.

When it was considered a great privilege to be taken out to dinner at a real restaurant with your parents.

When girls neither dated nor kissed until late high school, if then.

When all of your male teachers wore neckties and female teachers had their hair done?

When any parent could discipline any kid, or feed him or use him to carry groceries, and nobody, not even the kid, thought a thing of it?

When they threatened to keep kids back a grade if they failed--and they DID.

When being sent to the principal's office was nothing compared to the fate that awaited a misbehaving student at home.

Basically, we were in fear for our lives, but it wasn't because of drive-by shootings, drugs, gangs, etc.

Our parents and grandparents were a much bigger threat!!! (and some of us are still afraid of them!!)

Remember when...Decisions were made by going "eeny-meeny-miney-mo."

Mistakes were corrected by simply exclaiming, "Do Over!"

"Race issue" meant arguing about who ran the fastest.

Money issues were handled by whoever was the banker in Monopoly.

When the worst thing you could catch from the opposite sex was "cooties".

It was unbelievable that dodge ball wasn't an Olympic event.

Having a weapon in school meant being caught with a slingshot.

Nobody was prettier than MOM

Scrapes and bruises were kissed and made better.

Taking drugs meant orange-flavored chewable aspirin.

Ice cream was considered a basic food group.

Getting a foot of snow was a dream come true.

Abilities were discovered because of a double-dog-dare."

Older siblings were the worst tormentors, but also the fiercest protectors.

Didn't that feel good...Just to go back and say

"Yeah, I remember that!!!

If you can remember most or all of these, then you have LIVED!!!!!!!!

Pass this on to anyone who may need a break from their "grown up " life.